Wednesday, July 06, 2005

2 hours til bed

i have a fairly relaxed style of parenting...diedre is the boss and so i pretty much just respond to her cues. so that means, tonight at 4.30 when she was really fussy and wanted to sleep, i helped her go to sleep. then she woke up by 7.30 and i had to help her go to sleep again for a couple of hours. it was very tiring, my back hurts from bouncing/rocking her...but i don't regret it. i like holding her. she is so precious and so nice to look at. i am planning to try to teach her how to go to bed by herself when she is closer to 6 months old. not far off yet.

i am so insecure sometimes that when people say "oh, you do that??" or if i hear them bad mouth people who have to rock their babies to sleep, i feel bad, like i'm doing something wrong. its amazing how as a new parent, i was totally inexperienced with babies but i had to learn to listen to some people/advice and let other stuff go.

it is the ultimate test for a people pleaser. there will ALWAYS be someone who disagrees or disapproves--and thats exactly what my personality hates. i want everyone to like me, respect me, support me. but it can never be that way. so fending off my inner thoughts and deprecations is totally necessary so i can focus what diedre actually needs from me. i say that diedre is the boss now, and although it can be hard sometimes, i love my new boss, she's the greatest.



Michelle said...

there is absolutely nothing wrong with rocking or nursing a baby to sleep, in fact, it is harmful to force a baby to cry it out in order to go to sleep :(

there will always be people who disagree with how you raise your kids.. some people are vehemently cry it out, and others who are equally *against* cry it out.. in the end, you and derek need to decide what is right for your family, and ignore what everyone else says. heck, there's lots of "main stream" type people who disagree with how i'm raising my kids, but oh well. gotta do what's right for my family :)

Michelle said...

oh ya, i also wanted to say that it's hard enough being a first time/new mother (or father for that matter) that it can be really rude to cause said new mother so much stress over how she's raising her baby! i mean, you're just learning about motherhood in general, and diedre in particular ('cause every baby is different)... who needs all these people causing you to either question what you're doing or anything!

ps. didn't know you were posting over here again :)

the salmon said...

re: posting here again: i wanted to surprise people who might go check from time to time, kinda like an "easter egg" in a video game or a "hidden song" on a CD ;)

thanks as always for your affirmations and encouragement of me and my parenting journey. you are a true friend. hugs to you